Alot of things are swirling around in my head right now.  Its was a VERY stressful week last week and I'm grateful to be able to slowly catch my breath.    A couple of things come to mind as I do and for me they are important. Amoung them is the word "strong".  This word means lots of things and on first glance and I never considered myself strong before.  But when I think of, mostly cause it got dragged back up so much on tuesday, I think strong is one word to describe.  Strong isn't not crying or whatever you need to do. Strong is in the regrouping after something knocks you down or for a loop.  Strong is in not stopping because someone says "you can't".  Strong is in facing your fears.     I have many fears. Part of having a shunt in my brain is that it comes with risks and fears. Its not perfect but its better than it was before I had it placed.    Each day I wake up I make a choice. Sometimes its not a conscious type of choice but either way it happens.  Each day I wake up determined to make a step forward, to get up and go.  Each day I face my fears and refuse to give up. Each day I do that I win.  Each time I do that I show that I am strong.  


So I now have a working washer and dryer. I am so grateful. I also have a bathroom sink that works.  We put the molding up in the kitchen and I love it.   Slowly rooms and things are getting done.   Sometimes this is hard because I want things done already. I had hoped it would be and that's hard/frustrating.   But it is what it is. What makes me so happy is that when people come in to my home they feel at ease and at home.  They see me in the decor that is happening. They see Bean in her decor picks.  

That said.... the rubber ducks for the bathroom we just aren't finding.  So tonight at Target Bean decided on a shower curtain that is whales. Its very old school preppy.  But its adorable.  So that is the theme that we will go with. =)    Its great to her rationalizing or talking through her choices for things.    Tonight the house smells so yummy since I baked bread, made chili and soups.    But I'm exhausted and my vision in my left eye is pretty grey so tonight rather than riding my bike, which I now have hooked into the trainer stand, I am going to rest.